30 Mar 2008 - Pew News

9.00 am Holy Communion Scrayingham

10.45 am All Age Worship Stamford Bridge

For all those involved in the Youth Work Training held in January. Could you please cast your mind back and let Diane know if you borrowed a Grove booklet - there are two missing, their covers are black and white, and they say Youth down the left hand side.'Diane would like them back please!

Would you like more encouragement and companionship in living the Christian life?
Then come along to the Home Group Open Evening at The Rectory on Wednesday 16th April at 8.00 pm.This is for everyone who is interested in finding out more about what a home group is.Refreshments will be served, so please let us know on 371353 if you are coming, so we can cater for all!

Tuesday 15th April 9.30 am - 4 .00 pm

St Columba's URC, York

The PCCs of all three parishes in the group decided that this year’s Easter offerings should be donated to USPG. It is still not too late to donate to this cause. Envelopes are available for you to put your donation in. They can be put in with the regular church collection of given to a sidesman.

Information on the work of USPG can be found on leaflets at the back of the church or by going on line to www.uspg.org.uk

Thank you for your support.

As both of St .John’s churchwardens are stepping down this year, we desperately need volunteers to take on this responsibility. Churchwardens are elected at the Vestry Meeting before the APCM on Wednesday 9th April.

Chris Whitaker has agreed to be nominated but we really do need two wardens. Please think seriously about whether you could be the person we’re looking for and, if so, speak to Diane or one of the current wardens, Dorothy Dellow or Michael Catterick.

Michael has a handout detailing the responsibilities associated with the role.

Your love covers the multitude of my sins. So when I am fully aware of my sin… then you are the only person to whom I can escape. If I try to cover myself against the guilt of sin and the wrath of heaven, I will be driven to madness and despair. But if I rely on you to cover my sins, I shall find peace and joy. You suffered and died on the cross to shelter us from our guilt, and take upon yourself the wrath that we deserve. Let me rest under you, and may you transform me into your likeness.

~The Church is like a great ship sailing the sea of the world and tossed by the waves of temptation in this life. But it is not to be abandoned - it must be brought under control. St Boniface

~Less advice - and more hands.

German proverb

Good Friday is traditionally the start of our DIY season – the time of year when hundreds of thousands of optimistic British householders decide that NOW is the time to tackle those jobs around the house. Wickes, the DIY chain, has estimated that we will spend over £1 billion on home improvement this weekend alone. B & Q expects to sell more than one million litres of paint.

Intentions are good, but the reality is alarming: according to the Department of Trade and Industry, there are about 100,000 DIY-related accidents annually. More people die every week in domestic mishaps than in

road crashes. The Royal Society for the Prevention of Accidents reckons that, over the average bank holiday, there are 1,400 serious injuries as a result of DIY. The simple step ladder alone defeats 40,000 of us a year. We can’t climb ladders, and there’s a lot more we can’t do: according to a recent survey by the Ideal Home Show, 52% of us can’t wire a plug; 79% of us can’t wallpaper a room; 62% of us can’t put up a shelf; one third of us, 35%, are even helpless when faced with a blocked sink.

If we have never sought, we seek Thee now;

Thine eyes burn through the dark our only stars;

We must have sight of thorn-pricks on Thy brow,

We must have Thee, O Jesus of the Scars.

~ A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk I have a work station.

~ A flashlight is a case for holding dead batteries.

~ A good scapegoat is nearly as welcome as a solution to the problem.

~ A gross ignoramus: 144 times worse than an ordinary ignoramus.

~ A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.

~ Did you hear about the dyslexic, agnostic, insomniac who stayed up all night trying to decide if there really is a Dog?

~ Why do they lock petrol station toilets? Afraid that someone will clean them?

~ Why is it that when we talk to God we're said to be praying, but when God talks to us, we're said to be schizophrenic?

Before U were thought of or time had begun,

God even stuck U in the name of his Son.

And each time U pray, you'll see that it's true -

You can't spell out JesUs and not include U.

You're a pretty big part of his wonderful name,

For U, He was born; that's why He came.

And his great love for U is the reason He died.

It even takes U to spell crUcified.

Isn't it thrilling and splendidly grand?

He rose from the dead, with U in his plan.

The stones split away, the gold trUmpet blew,

and this word resUrrection is spelled with a U.

When JesUs left earth at his upward ascension,

He felt there was one thing He just had to mention.

"Go into the world and tell them it's true

That I love them all - just like I love U."

MISCELLANEOUS OBSERVATIONS

~A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

~A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.

~Don't be afraid to touch bottom. It's solid.

~Don't judge a book by its movie.

~God must work in you before God can work on you.

~The way some people love to find fault, you'd think there was a reward.

~The Will of God will never take you to where the Grace of God will not cover you.

~I think there may be insanity in my family. They keep asking me for money.

~The reason a dog has so many friends is that he wags his tail and not his tongue.

~The worst thing about censorship is ******

The Sunday school teacher asked his class: "Do you think Noah did a lot of fishing when he was on the ark?' 'No,' replied one logical youngster. 'How could he, with just two worms?'

A man opened a newspaper and was amazed to read his own obituary. Much amused, he telephoned his best friend – who asked him rather hesitantly where he was ringing from?

The church will host an evening of fine dining, super entertainment and gracious hostility. Potluck supper Sunday at 5:00 pm - prayer and medication to follow.